conflict

"just talk when you want to run. reveal when you want to attack. so simply so obvious and at that same time so incredibly hard."

Ever notice how all fights are the same-- two people mad over something either yelling or running away and not listening to the other. communication may be one of the hardest parts of a relationship and a little over 4 and a half years deep in a relationship and I can say communication is the hardest part-- both listening and being able to convey how you feel to someone else is difficult but important. Whether romantic relationships or not we all run into this. So try and listen a little more, and say how you are really feeling. I am sure you will find that it will pay off :)

just some of my thoughts for today. off to my night class -- intermediate statistics lab with maybe an upload tonight. I'll see what I can do.

What do you all think about conflict? what are some of your biggest fights over?
xxox
Anita

10 pan update

okey so 10 pan is going to kill me. not really but here's the items
-physicians formula concealer in nude
-suave mouse
-herbal essence mouse
-clean and clear makeup remover
-anastasia lipgloss
-collasal volume mascara
loreal decrease
-maybelline define-a-line
-look ma new hands


it started last sunday though the video wasn't up then.

so. the concealer im using slowly its hard. the suave mouse is gone, herbal essance is one or two days away. clean and clear makeup remover i really hate and doesn't work so end up using another one after this. grrr. the lipgloss i really love and its discontinued so i don't want to use it up...should i switch this product out for another? the mascra is getitng hard to use. the decrease is still hanging on. maybelline define a line has a while still and look ma new hands has disappeared. i can't find it anywhere.. so i may never finish this.

well time for a shower and to use the clean and clear again. im going to finish it.

xoxo
Anita

good samaritan

im watching greys anatomy. best show ever. enough said. one of the few shows that uses real medical information. HOUSE is garbage. you don't test a liver by getting someone trashed (only episode i ever watched.) sorry if you like house but remember i study medicine so it bothers me. im invested in greys i suppose..ive been watching it for years.

today i was driving down the interstate and a taxi cab spun out of control and hit the wall. another car hit the taxi. i called 911. thats all i can do and i wish that i had more medical experience and could do more. i stopped, called and kept telling them not to move. Everyone seemed okey but if they were bleeding out all i could do would be apply pressure and hope to God they don't die before the ambulance gets there. Thats what I think about when I see people in accidents... how one day maybe i could help them. how frustrating it is to not be able to.

i have a new video up. i laughed so much editing it. go watch it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oi2FoAMtuxo

Tomorrow I am in the pediatric office again. The doctor I shadow is amazing. As one of the parents of his patient said "he's a lunatic but he's the best doctor." He is doing a lot of relief in Haiti... I wish I could go with. I want to do something noble.

can't wait for Mac's summer collection and 10 pan to be over! lol I have a long way to go but the loreal decrease is really really close. like its hard to get stuff out... but now i realize i have no base ... and i can't buy one. oh well. im going to try out alternatives and maybe do a video on it. :)

xox
anita

for your information

So in the last two days my life has been consumed by physics so sorry if I have been MIA :)

I went to the mall today to exchange a defective bra at victoria secret--- didn't purchase anything don't worry i didn't break my 10 pan agreement but I had to take it back because the strap liek fell apart so no money was spent it was just swamped. Anyways i went in forever 21 and saw lots of things that i kind of liked but didn't love. I really need to get some new clothes because ive lost a lot of weight and mine are a little big but not until I am done with 10 pan of course :) Not sure where I want to get them though. any suggestions?

ever notice how rare it is to find genuine people who really do what they say they are going to do. Someone I go to school with and I were talking about this and I wonder-- why is kindness so rare and rudeness so common? why do others find it easier to be mean than to be nice? You know they say it is 43 muscles to frown but only 17 to smile. Smiling is much easier (fyi: there is much debate on the actual number of muscles as we learn more about muscles with each passing year and redefine them. science is constantly evolving but the sentiment is there it's easier to smile.) I'm going to try and consciously smile more in the next couple days. if anything it might make someone else feel good.

anyways--
id love your feed back on why people are mean or nice. e-mail me if you don't want to comment here at fyiexplains@gmail.com

xoxo
Anita

time flies

So I tried these new muffin tops called Vita Tops and they are AMAZING. i really was unsure because most healthy food tastes like garbage but it genuinely was good and I kind of wish I had brought 2 today. Oh well. Poor planning on my part.

I went to the gym this morning. Ever notice how when you work out real hard you are STARVING all day. personally i don't want to eat more than normal bc i feel like that defeats the purpose of the gym. I don't starve myself don't worry :) I just try and be responsible about what I eat. The pack of carrots I just ate did nothing to fix the hunger. My goodness.

There was a graduate school fair today and I have to say it scares me to know that I will be applying in only 2 short months. Wow. Where did college go? and how did high school come and go so fast. I don't know that I am ready for the real world and I am really afraid of not getting into to a PA program. I want it so much and I feel like I've spent 15 years working for something that is finally here and there's a chance that despite all my effort I won't get in. If I don't get in then what? I am not being pessimistic, but rather realistic and trying to plan.

Ever feel like you are there for others more than they are there for you? I wonder where is the line you draw to decide between being understanding and feeling like people don't treat you fairly. I struggle with this a lot I try and expect the best but I do not always succeed.

I will say all the sweet messages from my youtubers do cheer me up. You are all so nice and I thoroughly enjoy doing youtube. It makes me sad to read of others who find so much drama through youtube but I will say I think it's easily avoided just be nice, don't judge others, and do your own thing. Remember that when you started you had 0 subscribers and no matter how many you have now that doesn't make you any better than someone else. I have 110 and even if I only had 10 or if i had 1100 Id still make my videos the same way.

xoxo
Anita

new blog

Its 2 am and I just created a blog. I used to have something like this through livejournal back in the day. This isn't your traditional youtube video blog. It's going to be more about me, my life, and tips for you and your life. Hope you enjoy :)

I'll try and update it lots.